It’s not me…

Ever since we met last year, it’s fair to say I’ve had an unhealthy obsession with you. There have been endless searches on the internet, constant conversations about you, even a blog dedicated to you. Wow, you really have took over my life.

You have showed me who my real friends are and of those friends, who is prepared to go the extra mile. You have proved that there are some amazing people who are unsung hero’s who dedicate their lives to helping others. You have showed me that it is so important to grab each opportunity that comes our way, to savour every moment and everyone in our precious lives. However, whilst there are some good points to our relationship, I can not (and will not) forget the bad things; you have made me cry (a lot), you have made me so god damn angry and most of all you have made me sad.

I went to The Royal today. The last time I went, I walked away with you….this time (my 1st 12 week check up) I walked away clear; without you and without any of your family or friends in my lungs. I know that I will get the full all clear in 21 months.

Walking back the car made me think: This kind of relationship is no good for either of us, so it is today that we must say goodbye. Whilst I appreciate that, given the opportunity, you would cling to me with all your might, I must stress to you; it’s not meant to be.

At the end of most relationships you see the head tilt and hear the patronising tone accompanied by the words “it’s not you, it’s me”. However, I would like to say – “it’s not me, it’s YOU”

Goodbye Sarcoma and I hope we never meet again.


19 thoughts on “It’s not me…

  1. Sarah buttery says:

    Hi Emma. I know we don’t really know each other that well but I just wanted to wish you all the best For a healthy and happy future. I have read your blog from start to Finnish you have done amazing. Sarah x


  2. Helen McNicholas says:

    An amazing post, so beautifully written. You have been an inspiration in how you have coped through this journey and it’s such great new you’ve got your first all clear. I would raise my glass to you – if I could ha ha ๐Ÿ™‚ x x


  3. Bev Hope says:

    Well, thank god I have read this tonight and not Weds when we are out or I’d be a mushy mess!! You are an amazing woman with a fantastic partner. Love ya lots xxxxx


  4. Janet Marsh says:

    So pleased for you Emma brings back memories to the day Steve got his all clear it is such a great feeling go and enjoy your holiday that’s what we did you deserve it love Janet xx


  5. Jo donkin says:

    Oh Emma you’ve made me cry!! You’ve been a huge inspiration to everyone that knows you! I’m so so glad that you’ve now dumped that nasty piece of crap you had in your life, shut the door , lock it, chain it, bolt it and NEVER let it back in!! Good riddance!!!! Well done you!! Love and hugs xxxxx


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